Sometimes life gives you a time that you didn’t see coming. A humbling time. A harrowing time. A time when you feel like you may not be able to put one foot in front of the other. Where you have to keep reminding yourself that the only way out is through.

I don’t know about you, but I know many who have experienced exactly that time in their lives during this past year. Illnesses and accidents. Losses and sadnesses. Compounded grief and hopelessness. To be honest, I’ve experienced some of that myself this year. I feel like maybe we all have. What made the difference every time another challenge presented itself in my path?

Community.

We’re Not Meant to Do This Alone

I feel like we are all taught that we have to learn to do things on our own—that to be successful adults in the world, we must forge our way and be able to pick ourselves up when we fall. I think there is merit to developing strength of character by overcoming challenges. But I don’t think any of us do that on our own. And I don’t think we should want to.

Building a community is like having scaffolding for a building project. It’s planned beforehand and cultivated over time. When the challenges arrive, and they most certainly will arrive, the scaffolding that was in place beforehand will keep the building from falling apart. Having people you can call who will offer the ride to the doctor’s appointment, those who will bring a meal when you’re grieving, the ones who show up when things are messy, and your house is a wreck…those people form your community. They don’t care how much you cry or how long it’s been since you cleaned your house…they are there for you because they care for you.

Some years, it’s our community that saves us.

Community in the Workplace Matters Too

Much like community can give us a lifeline in our personal lives, forming a solid community in our workplace is important too.

Living in a workplace community with people means constantly adjusting and responding to needs, whether that’s someone else’s or our own.

At Forum, we have spent this last year or so adjusting how our community responds both internally with our team and externally to our clients. As a result, our community is stronger, and we are able to provide more cohesive solutions to clients, either in an ongoing fashion or when urgent needs arise. Because the scaffolding is already there, we don’t have to build the plane as we fly it. We are able to do the intense work of guiding the ship to the harbor without having to navigate how to get there—we already know the way.

Community Takes Time to Build

Now, don’t get me wrong…community is not built easily. It’s a muscle hewn with practice and patience, and it takes time. The kind of trust needed to truly live in community with people isn’t built in one day…but it takes months and, sometimes, years, of support. And, we have to be willing to accept others’ offers of help. But when the situation arises where you need support, you won’t regret one second of having put the time in.

The food appearing on your doorstep when you’re grieving; the offer to pick up the kids while you’re at a doctor’s appointment; the early morning or late-night phone calls with words of encouragement—these are all meaningful measures that people may use as support structures in times of personal trial. I’m grateful for the people who have stepped up to do those things for me when challenges have presented themselves in my life—the list isn’t limited to these. There are so many ways we can support each other. And I’m grateful to be the scaffolding for someone else when their times of trial come.

Where Can You Build Community Next?

As we look ahead at the end of this year and the start of another, where will you be able to create more of a sense of community around you—in your home, your office, your third spaces? It doesn’t all happen in a day, but the best way to get there is just to start. Sometimes it’s as easy as asking a question:

  • How are you?
  • How do I reach this goal?
  • Can you help?
  • Can I help?

Be brave. Be vulnerable. Offer to help. Ask for help. Forge community.

You won’t regret it.

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